Selfish Express

Running Time: 

It’s YLNT VSOP, Part I! We convened a special session in San Francisco, featuring guests John Hodgman and Jonathan Coulton. Aided by Hodgman’s expertise and Coulton’s hatred of poetry, we finally got to the bottom of our most lingering questions:

  1. Why is Kevin Bacon famously uncomfortable around FAX machines?
  2. How does Adam save the world by not wearing shoes?
  3. What are the slam poet’s secret romantic techniques?
  4. Why are short films so long? And also: vice versa?
  5. Why do alfalfa farmers know so much about the Renaissance?
  6. What food is best eaten deep-fried?

…and many more.

Hodgman’s new book is More Information Than You Require. The YLNT Writers’ Retreat recently purchased 22 copies, one for each bathroom on the estate. The inmates—sorry, the “writers in residence”—seem to be enjoying it very much.

UPDATE: If you enjoyed this episode, you might like to learn more about how we made it. Check out the production journal.

Photo by Ryan Carver (detail). Check out his other great photos from that day here.

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How are you doin' there

As a Minnesotan, I wholeheartedly support a ylnt booth at the great Minnesota Get-together. This deep-fried heaping helping of blue-sky thinking must see the light of day. If it does go forth, I would like to offer my services to man this booth. I would even wear pants.


Why don’t I find this page when I Google NAMBLA Acres? All I found was those other pages. online texas holdem

Just started listening. I

Just started listening. I hope you guys didn’t overload this one with star power. This is a cozy podcast.

Nearly done- you did. Some great laughs, but things just sound too busy. You’re stepping on each other’s verbal toes.

Generation P

QUESTION: Do the next generation of podcasters call themselves “poddies”?

thank you

This might be one of the funniest things I have listened to in a long time.


I’m sure your guests are fine fellows. jc fit in ok. jh, so unright. a fingernail on my jocular blackboard. please go back to the threesome that brings tears of uncontrollable laughter to my eyes. my ears, overloaded and undernourished.

Funniest piece of audio I have ever heard

I do like to employ hyperbole on a regular basis but I can categorically say that this is the funniest hour of audio I have ever heard. Glad I was not driving or may not have lived to write this comment.

Thank you for the tears!


I have been an avid listener but this is the first time I have commented. I must to take issue with this episode. I was listening to it while working on my laptop at a local cafe. Your show was so funny that I laughed out loud, causing everyone within earshot to turn and look at me. It was complete public embarassment and it is your fault.

Secondly, I am from MN and you should get a booth at the State Fair, it would be outstanding. And, yes, ANYTHING can be deep-fried. This year I enjoyed chocolate covered bacon, 2 perfect worlds colliding? Yes.

Sweet Jesus I just listened

Sweet Jesus I just listened for the second time (I listen to each episode at least 5 times, often as many as 10) and I just got the joke about the couch and the poops. I peed, a little. Thank you so much for all you do for your listeners. We couldn’t laugh like this without you.

Let's Play House

Just to drop some science and back MM up, the Humpty Dance samples heavily from various parts of Parliament’s “Let’s Play House”. I don’t think the bass line is there actually.

I like my oatmeal lumpy.

I don’t know if this is poor form or just bad taste, but I can’t stop laughing at this:

baseline + poetry

I’d like to hear more baseline + poetry in future episodes. In fact, I think it’s safe to say that you one-up’d the ukulele intro / outro.

I’m also looking forward to your burgeoning merch / junk eco-system. Think: Snakes on a Plane - perhaps You Look Nice on a Plane or You Look Snakes Today.

Now that you guys are closely associated with John Hodgman I’m counting down the days until Sandwich will remain silent on The Daily Show. I’ll bet it was awkward to edit out Scott’s product placement pitches having to do with late night basic cable air time.

OK, so now that the formula jokes are out of the way, thanks for a really great episode - and seriously I almost wrecked my car when you guys did the poetry to baseline. That was pure genius.

Please keep me laughing. FPItS

Nice addition to the team

even if it’s temporary. Hodgman’s encyclopedic knowledge of nonsense and nothing in particular just adds to the chaos; although Adam scores the best line with “Murder on the Selfish Express.” (Clearly this a brilliant idea for a short film script based on a short story.)

At any rate, I’m putting away the short story now to start work on the novel. I just don’t have time to be considered only mildly crazy.

The best line certainly goes

The best line certainly goes to Hodgman with “No no no no, it has no pop”. Classic. This podcast gets better with each listen. I maintain my earlier complaint that it’s a little busy, but that just means that it lends itself to repeated listening sessions. I love YLNTD (don’t forget the D).

Prius smug balancing bumper sticker

My other car runs on coal.

“Dr. Nguyễn”

After listening to both VSOP episodes, I’m thinking John Hodgman sounds an awful lot like “Dr. Nguyễn”. Or vice versa.

Oh, yes, being a bike messenger...

It is definitely still a “thing”. I think the only difference between NYC “bikies” (OMG, I know, right?) and the SF variety is that in NY they drink PBR at noon and in SF they smoke pot on First and Market all day.

They still freak me out in elevators.

And I know they like it that way.

So I act scared to make them feel happy because I’m etiquette-conscious like that.

Why ...

Why don’t I find this page when I Google NAMBLA Acres? All I found was those other pages.

Haha awesome, quite the

Haha awesome, quite the funny!online roulette poker site online blackjack video poker divx movies horse betting iphone games